Confidence
- Lily Freiberg
- 1 day ago
- 4 min read
This week's episode is all about CONFIDENCE!
One of the biggest lessons I have learned from horseback riding is how confidence makes a huge difference in leading and guiding your horse.
Horses have a natural ability to sense our emotions, fear and nervousness being popular ones. Being confident while riding allows your horse to understand you mean business, and that's what I'll be emphasizing in this episode.
Weekly Check-In
It's been very hot and very busy for me lately.
From going to multiple job interviews and researching all I can about Veterinary School applications, to nursing my knee injury and fighting with American Airlines, I've been searching for all the me-time I can get.
I've been having some fun at my town's newly renovated pool, cooling off in the water and tanning on the lounge chair, and I'm pretty sure I'm made up of 75% hotdogs at this point.
I ended up canceling my riding lesson last Thursday because it was a heat index of 106 degrees, and I wasn't about to put myself or the horses in danger. (We are also down a few horses at the stables due to contracts ending, so I didn't want to be a part of over-using the remaining horses at the barn, especially in this heat.)
I ended up riding on Saturday, and discovered I still need to work on keeping my hands steady. It's something that I struggled with a lot in the beginning. It's gotten better overall with more training, but like any normal person, I do slip into bad habits every now and then.
I also discovered that there are benefits and drawbacks to having different trainers. While I get a diversity of personalities and teaching methods, sometimes my trainers can contradict each other on certain techniques.
It can get confusing when one trainer tells me to keep my hands up and forward, another trainer tells me to keep my hands low and closer together, and another trainer tells me to keep my hands wider.
But I'm not complaining because I love learning and I can admit I was having an off-day on Saturday in particular. I love all my trainers down, and I'm thankful for each and every one of them.
Confidence On A Horse
The no. 1 question I get from peers when I tell them I've started riding is, "Isn't it scary to guide such a big animal?"
I have heard countless stories from my friends that they're scared of horses, they've had a scary experience on a horse or they felt discouraged the first time they rode a horse because the horse wouldn't listen to them.
Horses can sense our emotions, and will sometimes mirror them. (I'll have another episode about horses mirroring our emotions at a later date.)
Think about how we approach other people: How does a warm and welcoming attitude differ from a cold and dismissive attitude? Do we respond better to the former or the latter?
Now, think of horses like they're human beings. Horses, and really any animal, will naturally respond better to a warm and welcoming person. Horses specifically will also respond well to someone who is excited and eager to learn.
I believe the key to comfortably riding a horse is confidence.
If we can show them that we're excited to meet them, if we can act warm and welcoming, if we can stay calm and if we can show them that we're ready to learn, they'll give the same treatment to you.
If we're nervous, if we're antsy, if we're scared to approach them, if we're tensed up and if we're frustrated, horses will respond negatively.
Horses are wild animals. They will have moments where they spook, get excited and they could potentially put a rider in a dangerous situation.
But we cannot decide to be scared of horses if your first ride was a bad one.
Like every relationship, a bond with a horse begins with general trust. You have to be able to trust them in order for them to trust you.
It took me months of riding to bond with one of the horses at my barn, so this trust will most likely not happen on your first ride, as it takes time with the same horse to develop it.
We also can't be scared of horses if you've heard a bad horse story from someone else.
Like I said before, horses are wild animals, so freak accidents can happen. Just because one person had a freak accident on a horse doesn't mean you will too. If you've watched a horseback riding competition, chances are that the riders you see in those competitions have had a terrible fall before.
But horseback riding, especially if you're competing, is counted as a sport. So the question then becomes: How are we OK with trying out other sports like soccer, American football, baseball or hockey — where you very much risk injury — but when it comes to horses, we shy away? After all, most of the "regular sports" we can list off may cause serious injuries such as repeated concussions and ligament tears that require surgery if we participate in them.
So, if we approach riding like we approach any other sport, there's an endless world of possibilities.
Why?
Because we're confident, we're excited and we're eager to learn. We understand the risks of getting injured, just like we understand the risks of signing up for anything that involves physical activity. We put those risks into consideration and we determine the feeling of learning something new outweighs the risk of injury.
We're daring, to put it simply.
If horses see that a rider is confident and eager to learn, they'll immediately pick up on that and understand that the rider means business.
Tensing up and acting scared actually puts you in a more dangerous situation, because there's always going to be a disconnect between you as a rider and your horse. Your horse is more prone to spooking or disobeying your commands because they know you're scared.
You always want to stay connected to your horse. It's safer for both you and the animal.
And the easiest way to do this is by being confident.
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