Bonding Time
Welcome back, my lovelies — today's episode is all about BONDING WITH YOUR HORSE!
Bonding with a horse is the first step to getting used to the animal, and therefore, it's one of the first steps to gaining that confidence I talked about last week.
Like any other relationship, bonding takes time but it's so rewarding in the end. Plus, it's easy, as you literally just have to be yourself in order to start the process.
Check-In
I injured my finger.
I was duck-pin bowling with some friends, and accidentally dropped the ball on the middle finger on my dominant hand.
Thankfully, my X-Rays came back negative for a broken bone, but I do have a wonderful (and very painful) bruise on the pad of my finger.
I haven't been able to do much of anything. You don't really understand how much you use a specific body part until you injure it. Fine gripping is not happening for me right now, and it's actually hard to do things such as write and eat a sandwich.
So, with that being said, I wasn't able to go to my horseback riding lessons because my priority is to heal my finger.
However, I did watch a couple of my lessons as I've been sidelined, and hyped my barn friends up. I also helped out at the barn as much as I could. When I was in dance, I was required to show up to classes, even if I was injured. We'd be required to sit off to the side with our ice and write corrections in a notebook.
And as a visual learner, this tactic actually helps me when I'm not able to ride. Watching someone correct the same things I'm working on helps me visualize what I need to do in order to fix my technique.
Other than hyping my friends up in our lesson, I have been getting ready to see Derek Hough's dance show in Atlantic City. He's my first celebrity crush, and I have meet and greet tickets, so I’m very excited. (I'm also excited to drink Pina Coladas on the rooftop pool.)
I'll be back next week with a massive update on how things went!
Bonding With Your Horse
I learned in a CBS Sunday Morning bit that horses include humans in their herd. This news clip was how my parents understood why I love riding.
Having a horse include you in their herd means that they will fiercely protect you at all costs. But it takes time for this to happen.
This is why in last week's episode, I emphasized that we cannot simply determine our opinions on riding unless we truly experience it. A pony ride at someone's birthday party or a trail ride on vacation doesn't fully count as riding experience because you're not doing much to form that special bond.
When you're signed up for lessons, trainers will put you on a horse that they think you will work well with — a bit of a blind date, if you will. If a bond doesn't work out with a newer horse, trainers will take that into account and will put you on a horse you're more comfortable with. And, taking lessons helps you understand horse behavior the more you're around them.
Just like we take some time to bond with new friends, bonds with horses take that time to form as well.
Like I mentioned last week, think of horses as human beings for a second.
Our reactions to certain triggers come from past experiences. Our past dictates the way we view certain actions and how we react to the events happening around us. Horses do the same. Their past is also important.
The only difference is that we can talk to our friends, family and even a therapist to develop different coping mechanisms. Horses can't. Horses use actions to tell you what they like and don't like. They're generally more expressive because that's the only way they can communicate with us.
For example, Gunnar, who was a former school horse at my barn, was unfortunately abused before he was bought and boarded at our barn for our lesson program. Tacking him up was a challenge because he was sensitive in certain areas. But Gunnar, being a horse, can't tell a trainer or a rider who's tacking him up not to touch him there. So he used actions such as biting and kicking to tell a person he's hurting.
This is why confidence, as well as a warm and open personality, is super important to approaching a horse for the first time.
We have to understand that a horse's aggressive actions aren't necessarily because they hate us. In fact, it may not have anything to do with us. Chances are, a trigger had been presented, and they're using an active approach in order to tell you that's a trigger.
Common aggressive actions are biting, kicking, stomping and pinning their ears back. Calmer actions include relaxed ears, playful nudging, dipping the head and quivering the bottom lip.
When approaching any horse for the first time, be warm and welcoming. Don't act overly excited, but don't shy away and act scared. Don't creep up on them.
Pick a bigger and safer part of the body to pet first such as the neck and shoulder. When you feel more comfortable, try petting them on the forehead or nose. Some horses may dip their head down. That means they want more love and are beginning to understand you're not going to hurt them.
If you're riding a horse on vacation or for a birthday party pony ride, ask the barn if you can have the opportunity to tack the horse up. (Tacking up means putting the saddle and bridle on in order to ride.)
Grooming (brushing the horse off) and tacking up are two great ways to bond with a horse, even if you're meeting them for a one and only ride. You can pet them as you groom them, or even talk to them. I promise, talking to horses becomes the norm at the barn. You won't be judged.
Find their sweet spot while you're petting them. Each horse has a favorite place to be pet. For Chance, I've found that he likes being pet on the cheek. For Houdini, he's instantly calm when I pet him on the nose.
Know what motivates them and what makes them tick. Chance loves his food and hates when he's separated from his barn girlfriend, Sassy. Henry doesn't like being pulled on the mouth, and Houdini doesn't like scared and tense riders.
Pretend like meeting a horse for the first time is like a first date. You're getting used to each other, you're understanding each other and you're testing out a potential bond.
If you take regular classes, try to get to the barn as early as you can, and stay after to help out. If your barn allows it, watch a class or offer to assist a class (if you're experienced enough). Barns most likely need all the help they need. My barn awards volunteer hours if you help bathe horses or assist a lesson. Being around the barn will help you get used to not only your favorite horses, but it will also allow you meet other horses that you may ride in the future.
Being a lesson horse girlie, I've had the privilege and honor to work with horses of different temperments and personalities. Each and every lesson horse has allowed me to learn something new about myself, and has helped me better my technique (more about this in a future episode).
If a horse becomes aggressive with you, take the time to let the both of you calm down and approach the situation in a different way. Allow them extra time to get used to you or whatever may be hurting them.
Accept that not all horses are going to be a husband horse (a horse who is perfect for whoever rides them). Some horses will take more time than others to warm up to you. And some horses you just won't bond with.
But when you finally get that bond with a horse, it's not only rewarding, but it's also one of the most beautiful things to experience.
For example, Gunnar was bought and moved from the lesson stable to the boarding stable at my barn. He is so much happier because the bond he has with his new owner is beautiful. He trusts his new owner and his new owner is so calm with him.
When a horse is loyal to you, they're your best friends until the end of time. Horses who are loyal to you might recognize your voice and your smell. They will come to you when you call or if they recognize your presence.
In my humble opinion, there truly is no better bond to experience.
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